In Honor of Stupid People

[Joker]

In Honor of Stupid People

In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping.

(Damn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).


On a! bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

(the shoplifter special)?


On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

(and that would be how???....)


On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost."

(but, it's "just" a suggestion).


On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down."

(well...duh, a bit late, huh)!


On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding: "Product will be hot after heating."

(...and you thought????...)


On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body."

(but wouldn't this save me more time)?


On Boot's Children Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication."

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head-colds off those forklifts.)


On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness."

(and...I'm taking this because???....)


On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

(as opposed to...what)?


On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use."

(now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)


On Sainsbury's peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts."

(talk about a news flash)


On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."

(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)


On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)


On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

(Oh my God ...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

[CAP]

Originally Posted by Joker

On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only."

(as opposed to...what)?

Underwater?

[Matt]

Originally Posted by Joker

On a child's superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."

Maybe not, but it will allow you to instantaniously ban members and remove posts at the morgue.

[packetjunkie]

HOw the fuck did this end up under my "In Honor of" post? :grrrr:

[nohsreg2000]

Originally Posted by Joker

On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap."

This must be from a french translation.

[slaughterj]

Originally Posted by Joker

On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."

(Oh my God ...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

Yowza, somebody must have really though they has big brass ones!

[CAP]

Originally Posted by packetjunkie

HOw the fuck did this end up under my "In Honor of" post? :grrrr:

What??????????????

[remster]

Originally Posted by Joker

In Honor of Stupid People

On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts."
(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

I actually had one of these given to me, I just could not believe what I was reading [img]/images/graemlins/supergrin.gif[/img]
But I followed the instructions and Everything went fine. What a relief.

[Whitebeard]

What about directions of most toweletts

'open, use, disgard' Well, what the hell am I going to use it for, stopping a speeding train?????? wtf

[onguardjeff]

I got a sunshield for my car the other day. The kind that pops open to cover the entire dash area.

It really said "Don't use while driving".

I swear.