THOR, the Viking god of Thunder and his friend Odin were up in Valhalla chatting. Thor said to Odin "It's been such a very long time since I've had sex"
Odin said "Mighty Thor, go down to Earth and find thyself a woman of pleasure and treat her to your manly delights"
And this Thor did!! The next day, he came back up to Valhalla and found his friend Odin. Odin said "How was your night on Earth, my good friend"??
Thor exclaimed "It was wonderful. We had mad passionate love and had sex 37 times!"
"37 Times?" exclaimed Odin. "Mere mortal women cannot withstand such abuse. You must go back down there and apologize to her"
And so he did, and found the prostitute that he had spent the night with. He said to her "I am very sorry about last night, but you see, I am Thor"
You're Thor??", she exclaimed with a lisp. "You're Thor?? I'm tho fucking thor I can hardly pith"
THOR, the Viking god of Thunder and his friend Odin were up in Valhalla chatting. Thor said to Odin "It's been such a very long time since I've had sex"
Odin said "Mighty Thor, go down to Earth and find thyself a woman of pleasure and treat her to your manly delights"
And this Thor did!! The next day, he came back up to Valhalla and found his friend Odin. Odin said "How was your night on Earth, my good friend"??
Thor exclaimed "It was wonderful. We had mad passionate love and had sex 37 times!"
"37 Times?" exclaimed Odin. "Mere mortal women cannot withstand such abuse. You must go back down there and apologize to her"
And so he did, and found the prostitute that he had spent the night with. He said to her "I am very sorry about last night, but you see, I am Thor"
You're Thor??", she exclaimed with a lisp. "You're Thor?? I'm tho fucking thor I can hardly pith"
Three Women, Two Younger, And One Senior Citizen, Were Sitting Naked In A Sauna. Suddenly There Was A Beeping Sound. The Young Woman Pressed Her Forearm And
The Beep Stopped. The Others Looked At Her Questioningly. 'that Was My Pager,' She Said. I Have A Microchip Under The Skin Of My Arm.
A Few Minutes Later, A Phone Rang. The Second Young Woman Lifted Her Palm To Her Ear. When She Finished, She Explained, 'that Was My Mobile Phone. I Have A Microchip In My Hand.'
The Older Woman Felt Very Low -tech. Not To Be Out Done, She Decided She Had To Do Something Just As Impressive. She Stepped Out Of The Sauna And Went To
The Bathroom. She Returned With A Piece Of Toilet Paper Hanging From Her Ass.
The Others Raised Their Eyebrows And Stared At Her.
The Older Woman Finally Said.........well, Will You Look At That....i'm Getting A Fax!!
__________________
The difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits. Albert Einstein
Two elderly ladies are sitting on the front porch, doing nothing. One lady turns and asks, "Do you still get horny?" The other replies, "Oh sure I do." The first old lady asks, "What do you do about it?" The second old lady replies, "I suck a lifesaver." After a few moments, the first old lady asks, "Who drives you to the beach?"
Holee crapolee....I posted that joke last summer Thor!!!
Anyway.....How many perverts does it take to put in a light bulb??
Just one....but it take the whole emergency room staff to get it out!
My brother in law is an emergency room PA and it always amazes me the stories he tells. Probably once a month someone comes in with something stuck up their ass. Shampoo bottles seem to top the list. About 1/2 just come in complaining of pain but don't fess up and most claim it was an accident. The most common is that they fell in the shower and the bottle magically was in there. He said nothing is funner than to see the xray.
A little boy takes his cat to school and his teacher asks him why he did it. He says that he was afraid that his father was going to kill the cat. The teacher then asked the little boy, what makes you think your father wants to kill the cat. So the little boy replies, I over heard my father tell my mother "When the kids go to school, I'm gonna eat that pussy"
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