Viper Alley - Dodge Viper Forum - View Single Post - No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service: An Alley Site Supporter Primer

**SeriousEric** · February 28th, 2007, 10:36 PM

Let me start by telling you how much donations are appreciated and what they provide. Most of us get a lot of enjoyment out of this place and of course the whole thing runs off of your donations. It pays for servers, web fees, upgrade costs, cool giveaways and the occasional steak dinner out for Mike Pierce (the heart and soul of this board) and his lovely wife. Many of you have given generously and it's all very appreciated. VA would not exist without it.

Now let me say something about what donations do not buy you. Big Gay Mike said something on the Dohhunter's Gay thread that got me to thinking and I thought this might be the right time to clarify a misconception.

A donation does not make you Abe Frohman, The Sausage King of Chicago.

I've used the restaurant metaphor before but it bears repeating. Let's think of the Alley as your local Golden Corral Buffet. You pay at the door and it's all you can eat. Cheap, lots, wildly varying in quality. One night the Swedish meatballs are four star and you stuff yourself like a hog. The next night you throw up before you can make it out of the parking lot. That's the Alley. If however, you decide to act like an ass and start throwing green beans at the other diners then we're going to get large minimum wage guys from the kitchen to hurl you face first into the handicapped spot out front. You do not then get to come back in and bitch that you'd only had three bites of iceberg lettuce before the late unpleasantness with the green beans and you feel you're owed a pro-rated refund. If you come in here planning on misbehaving then eat fast and get your money's worth outta this place.

Neither does a donation immunize you from abuse at the hands of the other diners. There are no waiters here. Once you're in the door you're on your own. If you belch, fart and flick boogers at the other diners they might just bitch slap you with wet fettucine. Once again ... don't come whining to us.

Give and give generously but remember that you get what you deserve.

That is all. Thank you for your support and good night.

Signed - $6/hr Earl in the kitchen with a hairnet and a runny nose.

February 28th, 2007, 10:36 PM	#1
SeriousEric I Don't Care SeriousEric is offline Join Date: Jan 2003 Posts: 14,942 Rep Power: 24	No Shirt, No Shoes, No Service: An Alley Site Supporter Primer Let me start by telling you how much donations are appreciated and what they provide. Most of us get a lot of enjoyment out of this place and of course the whole thing runs off of your donations. It pays for servers, web fees, upgrade costs, cool giveaways and the occasional steak dinner out for Mike Pierce (the heart and soul of this board) and his lovely wife. Many of you have given generously and it's all very appreciated. VA would not exist without it. Now let me say something about what donations do not buy you. Big Gay Mike said something on the Dohhunter's Gay thread that got me to thinking and I thought this might be the right time to clarify a misconception. A donation does not make you Abe Frohman, The Sausage King of Chicago. I've used the restaurant metaphor before but it bears repeating. Let's think of the Alley as your local Golden Corral Buffet. You pay at the door and it's all you can eat. Cheap, lots, wildly varying in quality. One night the Swedish meatballs are four star and you stuff yourself like a hog. The next night you throw up before you can make it out of the parking lot. That's the Alley. If however, you decide to act like an ass and start throwing green beans at the other diners then we're going to get large minimum wage guys from the kitchen to hurl you face first into the handicapped spot out front. You do not then get to come back in and bitch that you'd only had three bites of iceberg lettuce before the late unpleasantness with the green beans and you feel you're owed a pro-rated refund. If you come in here planning on misbehaving then eat fast and get your money's worth outta this place. Neither does a donation immunize you from abuse at the hands of the other diners. There are no waiters here. Once you're in the door you're on your own. If you belch, fart and flick boogers at the other diners they might just bitch slap you with wet fettucine. Once again ... don't come whining to us. Give and give generously but remember that you get what you deserve. That is all. Thank you for your support and good night. Signed - $6/hr Earl in the kitchen with a hairnet and a runny nose.